The Boulder

 2022 Reflection: Here I recalled one of two or three short-term jobs that, at the time, I thought were quite rational. But now that the Boulder has been revealed to me, I see the Radio Shack job, and the next two or three jobs in traditional sales, as being more of the same flailing about. I was creating one busy-work experience after another. I was vainly seeking to succeed in the practice of one of my great weaknesses. I persisted for years . . . for decades . . . in these fruitless pursuits. This too is an outcome of dealing a boulder built upon a foundation of trauma.   I left Fort Worth, Texas, and Texas Christian University, in 1985. I was like a fish out of water, from 1982 to 1985, as an MBA student. I don't believe there was a single moment that I felt like I was doing the right thing. I certainly didn't enjoy business classes.  Except for two. I took two particular classes in my final semester, that made me consider sticking around in academia, for a PhD. ...

2020 Reflection.  I am discovering more and more details about myself, and my thoughts, throughout most of my life, and the two big experiences that produced trauma that I did not know existed until the advent of the Anderson case. I know that my physical problems, the chest aches and high blood pressure, and nervous thoughts, were not normal, were not due to my diet or physical fitness - - - it was all anxiety brought on by policies of the University of Michigan Board of Regents, and then later, by some senior executives at Nortel. But I stress - - - these few people with power are not what gives life to damaging corporate practices: it takes a compliant and willing base of rank-and-file people: employees; neighbors; politicians; professionals; the news media . . . human resources departments . . . When you have been wronged, or you see that others have been wronged, and it counts as unethical in every sense - it becomes nearly impossible to find someone, including your closest f...